Plenty of stubborn myths surround STIs, and they can hand you a false sense of safety or pile on needless shame. The short version: an STI can happen to anyone who has sex, often without symptoms, and testing is usually the only way to know for sure. Below we debunk five common STI myths, each time placing the myth next to the fact.
We do this calmly and without judgment. The point isn't that you did something wrong, but that accurate information is sometimes a little more reassuring than an assumption.
For each myth you read the myth first and then the fact, so you see the difference at a glance.
Myth 1: only people with many partners get an STI
Fact: an STI can happen to anyone who has sex, even with just one partner. More partners can raise the odds, but a single unprotected contact may already be enough. So an STI says nothing about how often or with how many people you've had sex.
According to Soa Aids Nederland, you can pick up an STI through almost any form of unprotected sex, regardless of your number of partners (soaaids.nl). Shame here is often misplaced.
Someone who has just started dating or has had only one partner can pick up an STI too. It isn't about a number, but about whether unprotected contact took place.
The idea that an STI is something for "other people" mostly keeps the taboo alive.
Myth 2: no symptoms means you don't have an STI
Fact: many STIs cause few or no symptoms for a long time, while you can still carry and pass them on. Chlamydia, for example, often runs without symptoms. Feeling fine is therefore no reliable proof that nothing is going on.
Thuisarts.nl notes that STIs regularly run without symptoms, which can make testing the only way to gain certainty (thuisarts.nl). Precisely because symptoms can stay absent, someone may carry an infection unknowingly for a while.
Waiting for symptoms can therefore mean staying uncertain for a long time. A test tends to give a calm answer sooner than your body sometimes does.
Want to go deeper? Read why testing without symptoms can still make sense.
Myth 3: you can always see or feel an STI
Fact: an STI usually can't be seen or felt, not in you and not in your partner. There's often no visible change, no pain and nothing you'd notice. Relying on what you see or feel therefore gives an unreliable picture.
Some STIs can cause symptoms over time, such as discharge or a burning feeling, but far from always. A partner's appearance says nothing about a possible infection either.
Someone can feel completely fine, look healthy and still have an STI. Symptoms and appearance are therefore no reliable gauge, however understandable that idea is.
So "it looks healthy" isn't reassurance you can lean on much.
A related misconception is about how you can pick up an STI. Whether that happens through oral contact, a toilet seat or a towel, you can read in our article on STIs and everyday situations.
Myth 4: in a steady relationship you're not at risk
Fact: an STI can play a role in a steady relationship too, for instance if an earlier infection hadn't yet been noticed. A relationship in itself doesn't protect against an STI that was already present before you got together. Many couples therefore choose to get tested together before they stop using condoms.
This needn't say anything about trust. It's more about clarity for both of you, without assumptions.
After all, an earlier infection without symptoms can go unnoticed for years. A shared test can then help you move forward with a clean slate.
Some couples even experience it as a reassuring moment together.
Myth 5: the pill or other contraception protects against STIs
Fact: contraception such as the pill, the IUD or the contraceptive injection protects against pregnancy, but not against STIs. Only a condom or dental dam can reduce the chance of transmission during sex. The difference between protecting against pregnancy and protecting against an STI is often mixed up.
According to RIVM, a condom is the main way to lower the chance of an STI, while hormonal contraception plays no role there (RIVM).
Many people switch to the pill and stop using condoms, without realising that protection against STIs falls away with it. It can help to look at those two things separately.
No method rules out an STI completely, but a condom can clearly lower the chance.
So how do you know what holds up for your situation?
When the myths fall away, one calm message remains: only a test can give you real clarity, regardless of your number of partners, symptoms or relationship type. An STI isn't a sign of blame, but something you can get checked whenever you feel the need.
Not sure which test fits your situation? Our guide explains which STI test you need and when.
If you want a broad check, you can choose a full STD screen. If you were thinking of chlamydia specifically, read more about chlamydia, symptoms and how to get checked.
However you test, it can be on your own moment and at your own pace. There's no need to justify it to anyone, and a result mostly gives you peace of mind and direction.
Getting checked for an STI is simply a small piece of looking after yourself.
Sources
- Soa Aids Nederland - how you get an STI (soaaids.nl)
- Thuisarts.nl - STI (thuisarts.nl)
- RIVM - STI (rivm.nl)
Every blood test result includes a professional assessment from a BIG-registered doctor. For treatment decisions, discuss your results with your GP.
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